...comes GREAT TITS ?!!
HAHAHA!!
Guess what google images showed me...
Katy Perry is a bird... lol.. :P
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Another week has passed... Time warped again..
Pretty interesting week I'd say... hahah..
You know they how they say what goes around comes around... that's what happened...
Only now it's what trolls around comes around...
Nothing is more traumatizing than waking up to a dude in your bed!
Nonetheless, it was a jolly good time spent with my bros and my girlfriend...
And they went to church! how bout that! hehe..
Then again the week had its equal share of downs as oppose to the good times.
But i suppose it's the downs that accentuate the ups and keep our lives from being monotonous i guess.. or at least that's a good way to see it..
And of course if i can do something about it, I wish those never happen again... I know you were scared but the truth is I was trembling in fear within as well.
I know that is the way you handle your fear of hurt; in fear you turn to anger and radically leads to escape.
I know this is YOU and that's how you work.. And I know if I love you (which I DO); I have to love ALL of you including that of which scares the crap out of me (figuratively of course).
Sadly the way you behave is planting more fear in me. I fear of speaking the wrong things or simply of "putting foot in my mouth"..
Even as of now, I'm not exactly sure I should be bringing this up again..
But I LOVE YOU and I choose to believe that Love will conquer all..
The phrase of "That's just how i function" doesn't always (although most of the time you are) make you right...
Know that I am not judging you or anything because I am in no position to judge, having that said; nobody is ever in any position to judge.. But i choose to tell you this because there are things that in my right mind (as sound as God would have me) see that it is not right...
I know we should love each other for not just all the good but the bad as well... But it doesn't mean that we can't help each other to change.. I'm sure you wouldn't like me to be lazy and unhealthy in every way.. and you've done a great deal in turning me into a better self.. And for that, I am grateful..
Truth be told is that there are things that you do that hurts me.. (again, I'm not saying that I'm the only one hurting and making all the sacrifices).. I need to take responsibilities in every failings in a relationship cuz we're in this together..
When you tried to leave, you were not YOU.. It was as if something possessed you.. I know this sounds bad. I'm sorry if this sounds really bad to you but I was scared... Part of me wanted to just let you go thinking I'm trying to hold you down and you are not even letting me and worse still you are tearing me down as if you don't love me anymore.. there was hate in your eyes (at least that was how i saw it)... what did I do that summoned such emotion in you.. Did i deserve that.. Then again of course that was my mortal pathetic self.. Thank God I had Him in me that gave me strength to hold you down and I let Him take over..
Darling, I'm not expecting you to change.. at least not overnight.. but please promise me to think it over with God's help in your right mind when you're thinking straight..(God in the picture is important because if we think with our own understanding, the Devil talks.. and I'm not saying that you never gave a 2nd thought about the things that happened)... and same goes, if you see that there's something in me that isn't the way I should function, do tell me..
I love you my darling, as always... I know now that I was focusing on the wrong direction.. The downhill paradigm... I was afraid that I might be able to hold you down this time and I wondered how many times more I can take it; when how I SHOULD think is that I'm able to hold you down this time, I can do it even better next time..
I meant it when I say I won't let go... I was simply sidetracked by the wrong focus... My focus is aligned now .. You can count on me to keep you safe my dear... =)
Once again.. I love you.
Happy Monthiversary and a day... =)