Choice, Chance and Changes

"Change is the only constant in life." 

I'm not deep or whatsoever.. I just happened to have picked this line from a movie series (not even the movie but just the TV commercial).. I think it was scrubs. 

But it's kind of the plain truth.. Changes in life is sort of the indication that we still live.. People who will never change are the ones enriching the soil of the earth.

There's so much to say but so little time.

October is or was; depending on whether I can finish this post in time; a month full of changes. And Making Choices comes with the package. And chances is the promotional buy 2 free 1 gift. 

How does one summarizes a month full of events?

There's me graduating... Great time spent with friends and family.. Cows slaughtered.. Jobs hunted and so much more.. so much to reminisce about and so much to thank God for.. 

oh darn... it's 7.25!!!

<<<< TO BE CONTINUED >>>>

"I'll be right back after the commercials" xD 

I'm back.. 

And another few days passed.. with much happenings..

Not long ago, I was at this very situation, wondering what and how it's going to be when I'm out of Uni and thrown into the working world. 3 months have passed and I'm back to this job hunting situation again. I am forced to make decisions again.

But no decision I make seems to be right. Let me put my train of thoughts in words. Let's just start with me not agreeing with my current job. Everything in me wants to leave for good. When I act on it.. I regret it.. I take back my letter. And the more I thought of staying, more is pushing me to leave. Then I'll have to decide whether to leave for good, which I did and informed my boss. Then my boss and I had a session and his words made me doubt my decision but no incentive were intended for me to stay. And then I thought no harm making request since no one's gonna put anything on your plate if you don't ask. I did choose my words carefully and asked nicely. But he refuses to reply me, which made me doubt my action of requesting again. It made me think that I might be overstepping my border.

If I leave this company for good, then why did i join in the first place. And this made me think way back to my first decision of ever starting work before looking further. cuz now my 3months experience which means nothing to the society is now a hindrance rather than advantage. 

If they were gonna hire a fresh graduate anyway. One with 3 months of working experience and another with none, they still face the risk of both leaving after a few months. I just don't get how I'm in the disadvantage side. 

The mind of the society is so twisted. Or maybe it's just me... 

Afterall, this has always been subjected to relativity of the world which we unfortunately live in..

My boss asked me a question.

What do I want in life. An ordinary life or something more, a life of abundance. 

Everyone wants to be achieve a certain level of affluence, in pursuit of wealth and stuff. 

My mind has suffered enough damage from self-contradictory thoughts. I blame genetics for having so much grey hair but I know better. 

It's time I just let go of the wheel since I haven't been steering myself to the right direction so far. 

I shall live however life would have me. 

I did what I did and asked for what I wished. If God wills it, I shall receive. I might have made one too many bad decisions but it's not like I sinned because I made wrong choices. Whatever happens, I shall take it as God's will by default. 

A great weekend awaits.. 

Honey be careful cuz there might be a demonstration this saturday.. Just be EXTRA careful and come back to me safely.. 

I love you..