The past 7 days was almost like a roller-coaster ride... from a slow start of mundane routine psm work; to a sudden acceleration of excitement, travelling home, tasting of good food, Easter service and whatnot...
Then the week brings me back down low to this mediocre non-conducive atmosphere.. followed by a certain turn of events.. in a good way.. (not sure if it's an appropriate phrase)
I poured my heart out yesterday looking into the eyes... not behind a screen of any kind; i feel exposed and bare.. but I did and it felt like the right thing to do... since then that moment has been repeating itself like a video clip set to repeat in my head for the whole day... even now ;)
but what made me do what i did? what was the train of thoughts that led me to my decision?
well.. I've (we) been asking HIM for direction and guidance in our actions all this while... waiting for Him to tell us if this is His plan for us... and I've been doing so fervently... i didn't even dare to ask Him for anything until i was reminded of how precious we are to Him..
when we are asking Him for guidance, we often pray that He'd remove the plan or shut the doorway if it wasn't meant for us.. but of course we can also choose to go against that and go on with our own ways.. that is one thing that i've been struggling with.. Is this really His plan or it's my head telling me things? How do i know?
and then i thought of how far i've come back to my walk with Him.. Not in any sense seeing wise in my own eyes.. but evidently i've been walking much closer with Him.. (at times I'd fail to place him before me still but His grace is sufficient... He's not done with me yet)
we knew how we felt about each other, and we've been praying about this. I came clean with the Lord..waited for His answer..
then it occurred to me that He hasn't put a kink in my heart about this matter.. He hasn't shut the door.
but it still doesn't mean that this Is His plan right?
I've been walking close to Him.. He didn't tell me that this Is His plan.. but if this isn't His plan.. He would tell me in a way that I would know it's Him...
I came to a conclusion and this is it..
I love God ; and i know what i feel in my heart..
I'd go on and love; while constantly being reminded that He is the bridge..
I'd walk closer to God and at the same time with you..
With God in our heart and mind, He'd lead us away from sins and temptations
we'll never know His final plan until it comes to past..
but if this really isn't His plan; we're closer to Him now and he'd guide us and lead us away from here blamelessly, without sin to hold us back ; and unhurt..
Hence I am not afraid to Love..
Then the week brings me back down low to this mediocre non-conducive atmosphere.. followed by a certain turn of events.. in a good way.. (not sure if it's an appropriate phrase)
I poured my heart out yesterday looking into the eyes... not behind a screen of any kind; i feel exposed and bare.. but I did and it felt like the right thing to do... since then that moment has been repeating itself like a video clip set to repeat in my head for the whole day... even now ;)
but what made me do what i did? what was the train of thoughts that led me to my decision?
well.. I've (we) been asking HIM for direction and guidance in our actions all this while... waiting for Him to tell us if this is His plan for us... and I've been doing so fervently... i didn't even dare to ask Him for anything until i was reminded of how precious we are to Him..
when we are asking Him for guidance, we often pray that He'd remove the plan or shut the doorway if it wasn't meant for us.. but of course we can also choose to go against that and go on with our own ways.. that is one thing that i've been struggling with.. Is this really His plan or it's my head telling me things? How do i know?
and then i thought of how far i've come back to my walk with Him.. Not in any sense seeing wise in my own eyes.. but evidently i've been walking much closer with Him.. (at times I'd fail to place him before me still but His grace is sufficient... He's not done with me yet)
we knew how we felt about each other, and we've been praying about this. I came clean with the Lord..waited for His answer..
then it occurred to me that He hasn't put a kink in my heart about this matter.. He hasn't shut the door.
but it still doesn't mean that this Is His plan right?
I've been walking close to Him.. He didn't tell me that this Is His plan.. but if this isn't His plan.. He would tell me in a way that I would know it's Him...
I came to a conclusion and this is it..
I love God ; and i know what i feel in my heart..
I'd go on and love; while constantly being reminded that He is the bridge..
I'd walk closer to God and at the same time with you..
With God in our heart and mind, He'd lead us away from sins and temptations
we'll never know His final plan until it comes to past..
but if this really isn't His plan; we're closer to Him now and he'd guide us and lead us away from here blamelessly, without sin to hold us back ; and unhurt..
Hence I am not afraid to Love..
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